Have You Seen Me Lately?

So instead of passwording or shutting down, I thought the most reasonable course of action would be to simply “ask” the Canadian to not read my blog for awhile – easy, right? I didn’t invite him to read the blog in the first place so I thought he’d just respect my request and I could write with a tad less inhibition.

The conversation didn't quite go over as smoothly as planned. BIG Mistake. Huge! 

He was personally hurt and (in his words) “monumentally insulted” that I didn’t mind saying whatever it is I say (which lately amounts to nothing more than bemoaning a relationship long since over) to strangers and the blog reading community et. al. but he wasn’t allowed to read it. I, of course, take a much different view that its nothing personal but that I can’t very well write about HIM and expect it to be anything even resembling honest if I know he’ll read it. 

At any rate, I hurt his feelings and I apologized – a lot of good it did me. 

Blah blah blah, long story short(er) – he’s not reading. At least for now. 

So am I now going to  come up with some huge, personal, revitalization that could only be achieved within the playground of relative anonymity? Obviously not, but one could hope!

Frankly, I think he’s being a bit sensitive but I didn’t intend to hurt his feelings.

I Vote: Yes Please!

On a lighter note – the political conventions.

I will refrain from thoughts on the speeches made, views espoused and promises undertaken and leave that genre of commentary to those eminently more qualified than myself (though I’m quite pissed at that whole “can she be the Vice President AND a mother” statement. A comment that should infuriate any women who has ever called herself a feminist – but that’s a topic for another post).

But what NO ONE is talking about – what NO ONE has brought up – what NO ONE has thought to mention…perhaps the most important factor in this election…..right up there with world peace and starving children:

McCain’s sons (Jimmy & Jack) are HOT!! I noticed them during last night’s news coverage. Watch out Prince William & Harry – these boys might just have you beat! And yes, they’re a tad young for moi, however….SO cute! Then again, I seem to be on a “men in uniform” kick as of late. 

So for your information and edification :

Jack is 22 and is attending his fourth (1st Class) year at the U.S. Naval Academy in Annapolis, Maryland. He hopes to become a naval aviator. He was born and raised in Arizona and attended Phoenix Country Day Elementary and Brophy College Preparatory High School. He enjoys amateur car racing and has built his own race car. He competes in Drift racing and recently took his Mom with him in the passenger seat during a race. 

Jim is 20 and a Private First Class in the Marine Corps. He was born in Phoenix, Arizona and attended Christ Lutheran Elementary School and Brophy College Preparatory High School. His lifelong dream was to become a Marine. He is an avid reader and often shares books with his father.

Frankly, these are the IMPORTANT issues, kids - and we should ALL strive to be more informed!

 

Questions I Don't Want Answered

I’ve been having dreams.

Mostly about Fuckhead.

In my dreams we talk. I’ve been asking him a lot of questions but I always wake up before I can ask him the one question to which I want to know the answer to: Do you miss me?

Last night was the worst of all. In my dream, he was married to the she beast and they had just had a baby. I cried (in my dream) and I cried and I screamed and I screamed. It wasn’t a fun night. That’s absolutely the last time I allow myself to fall asleep without some kind of artificial somnial enhancement to block such dreams from my head – Ambien being my personal drug of choice.

I assure you, this isn't some deep seated unconcsious desire for some kind of cinema-esque reunification. I don’t want him back. I don’t. I promise. I don’t want a pot smoking, un-motivated, emotionally dependent man still attempting to relive his frat boy glory days. 

But I do miss being happy and completely in love – that kind of love that you read about, that you hear about, the kind of stuff that inspires tales such as “The Notebook” – emotions that you never thought possible until experiencing them; that love the brings along with it the possibility of all things and the strength to handle anything life throws into your collective paths.

I had that and it's dissapation has left quite a large hole.

Frankly, it's probably best that I don’t sleep long enough to hear the answer to that one question.

  

 

P.S. I'm thinking about starting to password again - what do you think? I just hate that the more noteable ex's in my life have access to these pages and I find myself holding back more often than I'd like to admit. So what's your opinion? Passoword or start a new blog all together?

Insert More Uplifting Photo [HERE]

After much deliberation, and because today I feel like it, I have decided to start writing again. The thought of the poorly composed "pity party" scenario as my lingering size 9, designer stilletto clad, recently pedi'd, online footprint as too depressing to fathom. Therefore...

Sheepish wave "hello".

 

Remember me??